How can you reclaim your personal power when you’ve already relinquished so much of it? Besides being very do-able, the solution is really healthy for you, and of course, empowering. I mean after all, you are reclaiming your personal power, right? To accomplish this without burning your bridges all around you, and without causing unnecessary harm to relationships, you will need to work on yourself; your beliefs, your thoughts and your habitual actions. This is going to be a big turning point in your journey forward, so please go at this process with patience and consistency. It will take time. You have the beliefs you have because you are existentially attached to them. Some of them will fly quickly out the window, and some won’t want to leave without a fight because, in essence, you put them there to protect you. They have been your armor, connected to your inner survival mechanisms.
You have the beliefs you have because of your reactions to your life experiences so far. Many of your existential beliefs were taught to you by your parents, teachers, social mores and so on. Nevertheless, you need to take responsibility for them, because wherever they came from, they are now yours. You can let them run you, or you can gradually take control, revisit them, choose to keep those that serve your health and growth, and change out the ones that are holding you back. At the same time, you can learn to change your thought habits. You can learn to become sensitive to when you are thinking thoughts that support your growth and expansion, and when self-limiting or self-sabotaging thoughts are habitually popping up. When you are clear that it is time to release a fear or belief that is no longer serving you, you can learn a variety of techniques to release them. You will also need to work underneath. You want to also work on your base emotional state until it has improved considerably.
It’s a lot like cross training. Working on any of these three areas; your beliefs, thoughts, and emotions, help the progress in the other two areas. As you allow yourself to feel better, for example, your feelings of the need for inner protection diminish and happier thoughts spontaneously begin to occur. As that happens, fear-based beliefs will loosen up a bit. As you purposefully work on your habitual thought patterns, releasing the limiting and harmful ones, you will find it easier to feel better and certain beliefs will spontaneously change for the better. As you re-examine your fear-based, self-limiting beliefs, your emotions will naturally buoy up and your thoughts will spontaneously reflect the inner changes. You are taking advantage of the interconnection of the three areas to make the work easier and your progress faster and less difficult.
So, here’s what will gradually happen as you change where you come from as a person. Your external behavior will change to reflect the inner work you’ve been doing. People will see the changes and react however they react according to the qualities of their beliefs. Change will happen very naturally. Toxic relationships, codependent relationships, situations where others are used to sapping your energy for their benefit, will have to give way because you won’t be feeding those kinds of relationships anymore. Over time, the old relationships will disengage and new relationships based on mutual empowerment, respect and balance will flow in to replace them. You will be bringing entirely new stuff to the table and a different quality of person or group will be naturally attracted. So, your associations will evolve, your relationships will evolve, you will remain powerful and in balance, and you will be more in control of your time and assets.
What do you think? Does that sound worth going after? It would be a fine idea to sit down and think about people you have met who are powerful, balanced, happy, and yet generous with their time and resources. People you enjoy being in the company of. Also think about those you know who spend their time and energy striving to please others, who tend to get sick or live in the victim mentality, who are seldom or ever happy. Or just think about the people you really enjoy hanging around, and those you avoid in light of what we have been talking about here. See if any light bulbs go on for you. There’s a pattern, isn’t there?